Archive for January, 2013

15th January
2013
written by Dame Suzy

I should not be upset. But I had purchased a “healthy” Cincinnati chili and heated up at home. There was a blob of what looked like low-cal (as in oddly smooth-textured) ricotta, which I mixed up with the rest. Then I nosed my nose closer. What’s that smell? Goat cheese? They wouldn’t do that to a heart-attack classic, would they? Yes, they indeed would. I powered through the rest of the dish, grumbling that for a small blob of “healthy” chili atop 5-cent spaghetti for $9 a pop was like wallet rape and wondering if pinching my nose would help mute the flavor like our elementary school teacher told us it would – he lied, and rinsed off the remaining bits sacrilegiously clinging to the plate. Then I started writing this post and NOW I realize I have to floss and brush my teeth without further ado as bleck – the malodor doth cling to my gums, foul beast…

Post toothbrushing update: All better, grumble grumble.

Advice: If you can’t make it healthy AND taste good, don’t bother.

14th January
2013
written by Dame Suzy

It took Style Network to alert me to a new service being offered in New York, Los Angeles, and Miami. They’re debuting a show called Built which features attractive, built handymen doing work in your home. I had thought of this a few years ago after being fortunate enough to have a handsome plumber do some work for me. Who wouldn’t $$ pay extra for that? How much entertainment and eye candy do you think the average woman sees in a week? Not much.

I’m so glad to see my ideas come to fruition. Another idea that came about after I put a condom on my toe; I had just ordered a hundred condoms for a business school class presentation and was playing with a few. When I held the latex tight, I felt much less than when the latex was free to move around. Only a year or so later, which means it had been someone else’s idea long before mine – I saw the condom in the store – it was tighter at the base and looser and less restrictive at the top.

I DO wonder, of course, how often Hott and Handy handymen get propositioned by customers for some extra TLC. *Sigh* Probably not as often as I’d like to pretend for fantasy purposes. 🙂

Since I don’t live in any of those cities, I’ll have to just live with my fantasies, but they’ll be aided and abetted by the visual stimulation of that new show. The (albeit lame and uninformative) website for the company is here at HottandHandy.com.